Victim

Horse with BlindersSomeone who suffers misfortune, circumstances or bad events

To become the spectator of one’s own life is to escape the suffering of life.  Oscar Wilde

There is no bitterness in life, but what man of earth has brought upon himself. Frater Achad

Although the world is full of suffering, it is full also of the overcoming of it. Helen Keller

Here is the thing about victimhood. It should be temporary, not permanent imprisonment and not meant to make us suffer for an excessive amount of time. It is not a doctor’s excuse for coping out, giving up, becoming a vegetable, or taking an overly extended sabbatical. We should not wear a sign around our neck to remind both us and everyone else that we have duly been conferred to have achieved a status of victim.

Something happens. It is unforeseen, unfortunate, painful, costly, and perhaps a host of other undesirables. It has knocked us off our course. We can find ourselves feeling sorry for ourselves. We can be is such a state of misery, we do not know how we can possibly continue going on. What has happened to us could be so bad, that our life as we know it has utterly been destroyed. No matter the reason, there is no good to be found by staying any longer than necessary as victim. Being a victim is factual and definitive. The time spent as a victim should be brief and isolated to a moment in time; not any longer than necessary. As soon as the event is over, our status of victim should start diminishing. The longer we deem ourselves to be a victim, the longer the suffering, the longer or severity is our damage. We probably know those who have accepted permanent status as victim.

It is okay for us to feel sorrow for ourselves, but it should be brief in nature. When we fall down, we get back up and get going again? We acknowledge what has happened to us, do our damage control, learn life’s lessons, feel sorrow, put the event behind us, pick up the pieces, and get going forward again. We should always seek to become better for our experience.

Philosophically speaking, there should be a law that gives us a certain time period to wear a victim sign around our neck, to feel sorrow for ourselves, to expect others to feel sorrow for us, and so forth. After the designated time, our victim status officially elapses. It is time to get on with life. There is no real good coming from maintaining permanent victimhood. There are always new possibilities, better circumstances, and worthy opportunities waiting for us. We cannot find them as long as we continue too long a status as victim.

Challenge: Do you suffer from “victimitis”? It is time to overcome this. No one can do this for you. Others may help you, but you must escape its imprisonment. Do not use this as reasoning to continue justifying where you are in your life. Move on. You are only a victim as long as you choose to be. Bury your victim status. Use your adversities to become a better and improved version of yourself. Good things wait for you. Go find them.

Wisdom: Men are chained to that which causes suffering because they desire to be so, because they love their chains, because they think their little dark prison of self is sweet and beautiful, and they are afraid that it they desert that prison they will lose all that is real and worth having… James Allen

Spiritual: (NIV)

Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord. Psalm 31:24

A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all. Psalms 34:19

We live by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7

Life provides misfortunes. We will have difficulties, challenges, trials and tribulations. There is no escaping them. How we respond; how long we suffer through them; is part of our life’s experience. We will have times when we are victims. We can go through these things totally on our own or we can be equipped and enabled by God to experience them in such ways as we grow better and stronger as a result. The choice is always ours.

Prayer: Please guide, direct and enable me to grow through life’s challenges, experiences and opportunities.

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